I didn’t sign up for this “club”

Last Tuesday afternoon started off with a sweet hospital visit to one of the Hispanic families I work with who just had twins at 29 weeks.  The babies and family are doing fine.  It was special getting to spend time loving on this family, especially since they don’t have many family members here, and were eager to share pictures and tell their story. 

As I walked from the Baby Floor to another part of the hospital, my heart and brain were switching gears into a very different mode.  I was making my way to the “We Remember” support group.  The group is a mixture of those who have lost babies through stillbirth, miscarriages, etc.  I have been going periodically to the group over the last year, and it has been a huge help for me.  But I have had many conversations with others in the group and one of the main things we all have voiced is…I didn’t sign up for this “club,” I never thought I would be in this “club,” I am not excited to join/be in this “club”!!  These are all statements we try to even talk ourselves out of the reality you don’t want to be in sometimes.

I mentioned all of that above, before sharing what a  blessing the support group is and the experience that is happening now.  It has been a safe place to say all the crazy things you are thinking, but really everyone else in the room is too!  Through this group, we have now started to meet earlier before the meetings just to have dinner together.  It is so neat how God has put all this together.  The hurts are all different, the experiences all different, the grieving all different…all these things unique…but somehow we are all able to love on each other and heal together.  Thank you Lord for this group.

I also wanted to talk about this because since being pregnant I have been hesitant on whether I should go back, I don’t want to cause others extra pain.  But I think this last time was confirmation that God is using that time in big ways.  One of the big things is meeting people where they are at whether they lost a baby 2 weeks ago or 5 years ago- and listening and empathizing from that point on.  So even though I didn’t sign up for this “club” I am glad I can do it with these folks, and see God working through it all.

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